I find this piece both confusing and troubling. Beginning towards the end of the piece, I cringe when someone says, “None of them asked to be born into the world.” Neither did Bill Gates or Barack Obama.

If this piece was an attempt to encourage adoption then why pat yourself on the back? And if you are tired of people asking where your children are from, I suggest you find a place on “Earth” where people will not ask questions to satisfy their natural curiosity. And yes I know many are just down right nosy.

I have never been able to walk. Now at age 59, I still get a lot of “What happened to you?” The dumbest question I have ever been asked: “Have you ever tried to walk?”

But over the years, I became more aware of the fact that life is full of curious or nosy people/questions. Therefore, I have built up a file of pre-responses that sadly, I must use quite often. The one I like to use most is when I am somewhere and something large and heavy needs to be moved. I simply tell others who are seeing me for the first time, “I don’t really need these crutches, I just use them as an excuse not to have to lift large objects.”

My point, get creative and philosophical with your calling. But please quit whining and patting yourself on the back. It’s unbecoming of a truly caring individual. The last person who should need to explain themselves is a person who has nothing to explain. Teach your kids well and they will boldly answer the questions with wit and a tone of pride for their mother; be it biological or adoptive.

And yes, I noticed the identical beautiful smiles. You are the Mother. (Smile, that’s a compliment)

1983 to 1993 Bible Study teacher at SF juvenile hall. Currently prison reform activist and author of Case Game - Activating the Activist; an autobiography.

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